May 18 (Day 11)

Today, we met with some students at out “sister” university, S.I.S.U.. We broke into small groups and had about 45 minutes to really talk and engage the students. There was no language barrier because these students spoke very good English. My group consisted of a young woman named Jing Jing. Her American name was Tina. She was very easy going and we bonded during our one on one session. Apparently, she needed someone to talk to because it didn’t take long for her to confide in me.

Tina is around 20 years old and majors in Finance. She’d spent a semester studying in Canada and had an American roommate from Texas. When she studied in Canada, she met and fell in love with a Vietnamese guy that was four or five years older. He wanted to marry her, but she declined so that she could return to China to finish her studies. I could tell that she was in love because her face lit up when she talked about him. Her parents didn’t know about the relationship and expected her to move back home after college graduation. In fact, her mom missed her so much that she wanted her to move back home before she finished college. Tina, on the other hand, wanted to go back to Canada after graduation and marry her boyfriend. They keep in touch via computer and webcam by the way. She doesn’t know how to break the news to her mom because she knows she’ll be devastated. I offered a little advice where I could, but since I’ve never been in her situation, I kept my advice to a minimum. I felt she just needed to talk and wasn’t seeking answers so I mainly listened. I was impressed at how introspective she was for her age. She said that she realized a few years ago that the material things that she was chasing were not bringing her happiness or fulfillment. As a result, she prioritized her life and identified those things that were important. She said that she realized true happiness for the first time when she went to Canada. She had not found it in China and she lived there all of her life. In Canada, it seemed to her that even the street sweepers were content with life. This contrasts with the hard life that she is accustomed to in China. Everyone works so hard for so little.